How can I get myself career coaching and promotional public relations in the workplace?
Why do good people get left behind?
One of the interesting phenomena in the world of work, and I encounter it quite a bit, is the feeling of very good and talented people being left behind for reasons they define as: – I don’t have enough connections, – I’m not one of those who “blows up” everything they do, – I was raised to be modest, if they don’t see me then I have nothing to do. I’ll wait patiently until they eventually understand what a cannonball I am… and so on and so forth, and it’s important for people to give an explanation for why they’re not progressing. So is it? And if so, how do you overcome the difficulty you have and advance in your career in your job?
“Once again, I am being bypassed…with all the investment of soul and time, and yet no credit goes to me, and the promotion and praise go to others and I am simply not counted…”
The explanation for ourselves is that others know how to talk about themselves and I don’t…
I’m modest and don’t know how to do good PR for myself, it’s just a matter of self-confidence…right?
The truth is that when the gap between what I think of myself and my abilities and what others think of me is too large, there are setbacks in progress, and until this gap is reduced, it will not be possible to move forward. If you have faith in your abilities, if your professionalism is beyond doubt, it is worth working on breaking through the barrier of modesty, shame, and the difficulty of bringing yourself to the forefront.
In personal coaching , and a dedicated career coaching process, we will work on ways to bring yourself to the forefront in a professional and matter-of-fact manner, on managing a dialogue from a place of clear self-statement so that the message gets across, and on the secret of how to manage work relationships and promotional public relations at the same time.
I meet many people who think and behave like this. And you’d be surprised! It’s not specific to one class or one gender. Which is quite surprising, and I’ll make a reservation and say that it’s not based on statistics but very much based on real conversations.
I meet quite a few, it’s a feeling of very good and talented people who are left behind for reasons such as: – not having enough connections, – not “blowing up” everything they do, – being modest, and waiting to be seen. And these are managers at different levels, and these are people at different levels. Not exactly a direct connection to status. The reason is that it also has to do with education, worldview, internal psychological issues, but quite a bit to this experience, and dealing with the results.
Career coaching process to take responsibility for our careers
It turns out that we all sin in the story of Cinderella and the Prince as a metaphor (without gender definitions), that someone will see us, save us and elevate us in status and conditions… We still have this childish desire for someone to do something for us because we are very, very special and different from others and now he or she sees it and will do something with it. Sounds childish, but very much not. We all sin in this, regardless of age. Absolutely not.
I have met managers of all ages who have advanced with the help of talent, professionalism, knowledge, and the timing of things, and now suddenly they are stuck. It is not progressing. And they are not able to say now it is my turn, look at me, look at how much I am worth. Sometimes it is ego, pride, sometimes it is fear, and many other reasons. But the result is one. We do not move. This is true in a very broad sense without putting it into the framework of organizations or roles of a certain type only. So how can we overcome this difficulty and move forward, we will focus on it and I will also give some tips below that will help move.
Someone once told me this general statement – why don’t we as a society see the good people and promote them, but rather the ones with the connections…not to mention the lies? The ones who inflate themselves with me and me and me…and do nothing.
There are two answers for effective career coaching. At least:
One – we can’t expect anyone to understand what we want without us saying it. In my opinion, it’s out of respect for you as an adult.
As adults, we guess what children mean, but at some point we teach them to say… So – if you don’t say that you exist and want something, how would they know? It’s easier to provide for someone who wants something and know it than to start guessing who wants what… right?
So, you can see in the next role that we want a type of product that I want and need. So for them to know that I am a suitable customer I need to say something, mark, ask, point out. If they didn’t know… they wouldn’t approach me with this option. If they knew, they might offer me and the price wouldn’t suit me, but then you can start talking. With yourself or with the supplier. Then you can drive some kind of progress. And sometimes the world helps too.
I can see myself as the right solution to the situation, so my role is to talk about the solution, the value I bring, to help my company do better.
If I believe I’m good, and I believe I’m the right person for the job, then it’s important that I direct the spotlight towards myself! I’m allowed to keep all that goodness from the place I work. Isn’t that right?
There is also another thought…
The second – to ask, how does this perception help you? The perception that the good ones are not seen and that is why I am left behind. In other words, could it be just for the sake of the mental game now that placing the responsibility on someone else who is wrong actually fixes us too? That this perception serves something in your mind. There is a great deal of ego security in looking at things from the sidelines and accusing someone else of missing you, rather than bringing yourself to the front, taking the risk of knowing what people really think of me, maybe there will be a price for that, it is a risk.
If we take the risk, we might hear one of these answers:
– They will tell me that I’m actually not a good fit and it’s best for you to stay where you are…or we don’t have an option from an organizational perspective.
– Or maybe we would prefer you to take the hint that you’re not a good fit and leave.
– Or why didn’t you say so until now, probably howl, let’s see how we do it.
In each of the answers we come out of the story a little worse off:
– If I’m not suitable for promotion, there’s no possibility of promotion or they want me to leave – then what decision should I make now. After hearing something like that, it doesn’t make sense to me. How do I continue from here? What does that say about the place, about what I’ve understood about myself so far or haven’t understood, what does that say about me?!
– And if there are no other options, then does that mean I need to start looking for a new job…? Do I have the desire, strength, courage, and patience?
So maybe it’s better for me not to hear those words so as not to make any decisions right now.
If they tell me to go ahead – here too questions arise such as:
– What have I been afraid of until now, why have I wasted time?
– Oh, now I really have to show that…growing up isn’t always easy. It’s a little scary! And it requires a new assessment. Maybe they’ll be disappointed in me? Or I’ll be disappointed….
– I completely understand this feeling and the frustration. But you have to admit that it’s also pretty fun to be in a place that doesn’t take too big a risk of being exposed, saying, “Look at me,” and then explaining that it’s a failure of the system that doesn’t see you….
Career coaching helps in a situation of implosion
So, when we encounter something that doesn’t happen to us, we can always blame someone, it’s reassuring, it’s good, it’s safe, and it’s nice to have someone to blame.
But after we’re really tired of this situation, that we don’t want to be in this place anymore, the obvious question is whether we really want to change. If the answer is yes, then the real work begins. If not, then maybe it’s worth looking at things a little differently.
And this “yes” is our most honest yes with ourselves. Not what we tell the world so they think…what story we’re selling to come out well. But our truth with ourselves. Because then we can start working on eradicating fear and overcoming it.
